The Hard Truth of Reading The 5 Love Languages from a Single’s Person’s Perspective
I have not finished reading the 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love that Last yet. But by the time I finish this post, I will be done. Here are my thoughts prior to reading this book from a single person’s perspective:
I don’t think there is a one-size-fits-all solution that can take you from single to un-single.
Nevertheless, I do realize that the way you connect with others can make things a lot easier.
Why is that?
You aren’t emotionally attached to someone.
You learn what you actually like to do.
You make it a habit to check in on yourself! And discover what’s important to you.
Now that is said, here is what I discovered by reading the 5 Love Languages and the hard truth I came upon after reading the book.
Emotional vulnerable
Being able to show up as your authentic self, no matter the occasion, is powerful. You can build connections that can last a lifetime. Additionally, you learn how to communicate with another individual through their love language.
Love Tank
If you don’t fuel the love you have for yourself, it can be challenging to put yourself out there. So, how can you fuel your love tank when it’s empty, and you’re single?
Connection
One of the hardest things you are going to do is take the first action. Sometimes, it can be terrifying to talk to people you have never met before. How exactly can you break out of your shell to speak to people?
There are several techniques you can use starting today that will break you out of your comfort zone. Here are a few examples of things you can do.
When you go to the grocery store, go down an aisle, stand near a person who’s close to an item you want, and ask what they suggest is the best brand.
Bold move. Maybe, but it’s a start. Break out of your shell and speak to others.
If you aren’t comfortable doing that, you might consider having a simple exchange with the cashier. When you are approaching the checkout aisle, typically, the cashier says, “How are you?”
This is the perfect opportunity to tell them how you are feeling, regardless of whether you are having a good, okay, or temporarily not so great day.
An interaction at the grocery store can be the motivation you need to meet others at other events you attend.
Remember, connection happens when you are able to connect with yourself!
Affirmation is Key
You set the tone for how your day is going to be. Although that is true, there are some things that are out of our control.
Every setback is a redirection and comeback for better things to come. Only if you allow them to.
No matter how difficult things may seem, realize how far you’ve come. Give yourself a compliment.
Remind yourself of all the hard work you’ve done to get to this point.
A few ways you can remind yourself are sticky notes, a jar, and your voice.
Sticky notes
Grab a few sticky notes, a pen, or a pencil, and write affirmations that make you feel like you. Stick it on the mirror. Read your affirmations daily and boost your self-esteem.
Jar
Pick up an empty jar from the store. Cut up a few pieces of index cards or paper and write positive words. Place all the words you want to embody in the jar. Anytime you need a reminder, shake up your jar and pull an affirmation out.
Your voice
You have a unique voice. Record the positive affirmations you want to hear on your phone. Save it and listen to your own voice. You are capable of achieving anything you set your mind to.
No matter how much you affirm things, it’s essential to take time for yourself.
Quality Time
Check in to see how you feel each day or weekly. You are in control of what you do with your time.
Have that conversation.
Thus, you should take the time to have internal conversations. You could ask the following:
How do I feel after a long week?
Did I treat myself to anything this week?
Have I had the chance to do other things I enjoy?
What do I enjoy?
Don’t be afraid to whip out that notebook or journal and write it down. Here’s the thing: you shouldn’t just write it down and forget you even did. Acknowledge what you like to do and haven’t done.
Go to your calendar. Mark out times to go do the things you want and take action.
Even if you are single, go out and do the things you want to do.
You may end up meeting new people and making connections while you do the things you love.
You get to discover who you are as an individual!
A present you can give yourself.
Receiving Gifts
The best gift you can give yourself as a single individual is taking care of yourself.
You can’t do anything if you are unwell, exhausted, running on an empty tank, or restless. I think you get the point.
Thus, it is imperative to listen to what your body is telling you and take action.
To re-energize your body, you can:
Incorporate naps or close your eyes
Take time to rest your mind, soul, and body. During the work week, you should make time to rest your eyes, especially if you are looking at a computer screen all day. For instance, you can simply set your timer to five minutes after you’ve eaten lunch, shut your eyes, and tune out everything.
This is a time to decompress. Take a few minutes.
If you aren’t too busy, plan an event to go to on the weekend.
Are you exhausted from working all week? Rest up before you go out.
Give yourself time to reset.
You want to be fully present for things you enjoy or set aside to do.
Set aside breaks
I can’t stress this enough. Don’t skip your breaks. You can designate specific times when you take them. The main idea is to step away from your workstation.
Get up and stretch your body. Grab your favorite morning drink from the break room.
Go outside and take a deep breath
If you are working from home and you are overwhelmed, go outside for a few minutes to connect to nature.
You’ll realize how important it is to be present and form connections, so you won’t feel alone, even if you are single.
Treat Yourself to a Physical Gift
Taking care of your body is a gift because you want to be able to get up and do things you’ve been holding off on your bucket list.
However, don’t be afraid to make room in your budget to give yourself gifts on those special holidays or birthdays.
You deserve to be celebrated.
You don’t need to wait to gift yourself. You deserve to treat yourself any time of the year, overcoming any obstacle, receiving an award, checking off your goals, and anything else you desire.
As a result, you discover that the gifts you give yourself can be a reflection of what you genuinely want to give to others.
Acts of service for one or more
When assisting others, is your love tank full?
Your love language could be an act of service. You might know someone’s love language is just that.
No matter what the case, maybe you can give back to others even as a single person. Here are a few things you can do.
Donate your old clothes
When you get older, there are clothes you probably can’t wear anymore. So why not donate to those you truly need? Find a location in your area.
Feed the hungry.
No one should ever feel hungry, even if it’s not a holiday. See if there is a soup kitchen in your town that serves others in strenuous times. You’d be surprised at what you can give to yourself when you help others in need.
Assist in a program
Do you ever wish you could relive time, like going back to high school to change or relive a moment? Discover a program that helps the youth in your community. It may not take you back in time, but it may help another generation of kids make the most of their time.
Thus, it may help you reshape the way you view high school.
The advice you give can transform how a generation and yourself view time.
After all, time is valuable.
Un-learn stereotypically roles
Growing up, you could’ve been told that certain roles were dedicated for men and women. Not true. For instance, cook in the kitchen. Females and males can learn to cook.
Don’t be afraid to learn new skills that are considered for the opposite gender. For example, learn how to build your own shelf. You’d be surprised at how many women learn how to build things from scratch.
It can be beneficial to tap into what society has made out to be the typical female and male roles and try it out.
It may not be for everyone. You might even be terrible at that role.
That said, it allows others to see that stereotypical things are only based on perception.
Branch out and try new things.
Physically Touch
No one was around. What can I do as a single person?
If your love language is physical touch, give yourself a hug. Wrap your arms around each other and give yourself a hug.
You deserve to make yourself feel loved.
Don’t wait for someone else to do that.
You are your biggest priority. Fulfill what you need—a touch that nourishes your soul. Here are a few physical touch activities you can do:
Ballroom Lessons
There are a variety of dances you can learn that give you the opportunity to touch. Put yourself out there, reconnect with your body, and allow everything else to flow.
Cooking Class
Sign yourself up for a thrilling day to take a cooking class. Don’t be afraid to get your hands messy and choose a class where you can learn how to make things from scratch. It’s an exciting way to try and add new recipes.
Pottery
Are you a person who finds unique art pieces so appealing that you’d wish to create something like them? If so, you might consider taking a pottery class. The perfect way to get your hands messy is to build an object you might use in the kitchen, like a mug.
Discover how you want your emotional love language to translate for you. It will allow you to overcome the hard truth with ease.
The Hard Truth
Reading the 5 Love Languages can make you aware of just how single you are, and that can be a hard truth for any individual to accept.
The worst part is that you may be around couples all the time.
Thus, it can make you feel like you are craving to meet someone to share your life experiences with, someone you can vent to, someone you can try new things with, and someone you can make the most of each day.
“Sounds nice, but I’m single,” you might be thinking.
First things first, have you given yourself the chance to discover your emotional love language?
Often, when you are single, you can feel like something’s missing. Thus, this book confirmed that it is essential to lift yourself up. Don’t neglect fueling your love tank with your love language.
It will become easier for you to know what you want. Don’t be afraid to explore new ways to build connections.
Overview
One of the hardest things to do is to fulfill your emotional love language. It’s even harder when no one else is taking the time to do so.
Surround yourself with people who inspire you to become a better version of yourself.
“Why are you still single?” It will sound like, “What am I not willing to settle for because my love tank is full?”
I was quite surprised that the 5 Love Languages has a single-edition book. And, of course, I had to buy it.
Being single can allow you to unlock your emotional love language and dialect.
You’ll be confident enough to follow your intuition and make decisions that are right for you.
You will always be there for yourself, even when there’s no one around.
Hello there, my name is Vikita. I’m an aspiring author. I’ve written my first fiction novel and want to share the tips, tricks, and some of the things I learned throughout my journey. And I figured this was the perfect way for you to get to know me.
